The Boy Who Changed

Day by day,

Never looking the same,

This is the boy who changed.

No matter what,

No matter how hard he tried,

He just couldn’t keep his eyes,

Hair, clothes, or skin.

They never stayed the same,

And he hoped there was something deeper within.

Even when he loved her,

The girl form his unknown dreams,

There was something missing.

His lack of self-discovery

And acceptance

Hindered him to be the same.

He pondered, he wondered,

“Will I always be changing?”

All anyone could say

From then up to this day was

That he would always change.

Copyright © 2016 by Nita Pan

All rights reserved.  This post or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a review.
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Run!

I’m afraid that if I go that way,

These memories will start calling;

They’ll start churning and burning.

There’ll be nothing I can do

When the skies go up in flames.

Please, believe me

What I’m saying may not be the truth,

But it is truth.

So run.  Run!

When the skies are falling

Run!

Copyright © 2016 by Nita Pan

All rights reserved.  This post or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a review.

Never Give Up

I haven’t found love

But I’m not giving up

I haven’t solved my problems

But I’m not giving up

My family’s still broken

But I’m not giving up on them

My friends aren’t always there for me

But I’m not giving up on them

The world is on the brink of self-destruction

But I’m I’m not giving up on it

God is taking an eternity to answer my prayers

But I’m not giving up on Him

Countries war, bodies of children litter the floor

Long-lost lovers reconcile

And husbands and wives separate

Babies are conceived

 Children are abandoned

Disease eats away at promising individuals

And the cowardly and hateful live

The weight of the world

Rests on us all

But I know we can turn it all around

I’ll never give up

Copyright © 2016 by Nita Pan

All rights reserved.  This post or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a review.

Hey Courtney

Hey Courtney,

Didn’t you see the way he broke

After his parents wrapped around that tree?

The blank slate of his face when you said it was on purpose.

Did you cry when they found that boy’s body floating on the lake?

Hey Courtney,

How many times did you throw cupcakes at Alison H.?

Did you get a kick when she slit her wrists and nearly died?

 Hey Courtney,

Your heart is a box that hasn’t been unlocked in so long.

Can’t you feel anything?

When you’re having sex with your best friend’s ex are there any regrets?

The videotape he made recorded everything.

Hey Courtney,

The tape wasn’t the only thing made that night.

Hey Courtney,

Even though you should feel lost and alone

You’re too busy drinking your worries away.

Don’t you see that if you keep this up the baby won’t be okay?

Hey Courtney,

You drive to the clinic to get something done

About that baby bump.

Hey Courtney,

Were you sober enough to see the headlights?

Hey Courtney,

Shadows dance before your eyes.

Your whole body aches and you finally worry about the other life inside.

You’re wheeled to the maternity ward.

Vomit stains the hospital floor.

You scream as they yell push!

Hey Courtney,

Cradling that piece of magic in your aching arms,

You think to yourself that nothing could go wrong.

Hey Courtney,

You don’t care that he has his father’s eyes.

All you see is that God sent you an angel in disguise.

Your life’s on a new course;

You’ll say you’re sorry to all you’ve wronged.

Thinking of the drowning, you hold up the babe.

“Daniel-James is your name.”

But, hey Courtney,

Daniel-James was three months early.

Courtney,

Can’t you see that this isn’t the end?

Even though he’s entangled in tubes, he’ll be alright.

You’ll be alright.

Copyright © 2016 by Nita Pan

All rights reserved.  This post or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a review.

A Better Way

Around the back of the building

There’s a group of teens getting high

There’s got to be a better way

To escape

In the parking lot

There’s two strangers making love

There’s got to be a better way

To release

Hiding in the library

There’s a student killing himself with his studies

There’s got to be a better way

To succeed

Sitting at the back of the classroom

There’s a girl hiding under a hood

There’s got to be a better way

To live

Somewhere in your neighborhood

There’s a school with screwed up kids

There’s got to be a better way

To grow up

Copyright © 2016 by Nita Pan

All rights reserved.  This post or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a review.

Remind Us

Years fly by,

Days turn to dust,

And we wonder where the time went.

The clock spins out of our control,

Reminding us how helpless we are.

Hours whiz past,

Minutes drag on,

And we rush about in our busy lives.

The calendar pages are quickly filled,

Reminding us of all the lost moments.

Decades turn to centuries,

Centuries turn into a millennium,

And we’re shocked by all that’s changed.

Our empires crumble all around us,

Reminding us that all must end.

Books are written,

Songs are sung,

And we wonder if we’ll live on.

The libraries burn and records break,

Reminding us that much can be lost.

Children are born,

People research and dig,

And we’re rediscovered.

The rubble of our time, their history,

Reminds them of their ghosts.

Copyright © 2016 by Nita Pan

All rights reserved.  This post or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a review.

Too Different

“Be yourself.  No one else can be you.”

“Be unique!”

“You’re so original!”

“Why are you so…  different?

Wait, what?

“Why can’t you be like everyone else?”

“Normal people don’t dress like that.”

“God, you’re such a freak.”

To this day, I hear people compliment my uniqueness and the very same say that I’m too different.

Whatever that means.

I could go on a huge rant about how society conditions young people from childhood to be a certain way, and once they grow up, they’re an adequate example of society.  But the goal of this post is to get my message across in less that two hundred words.

Everyone is different and there will always be those who cut you down for it.

That’s the truth of it.

But guess what?

The same person who says you’re too different is being tormented for being unique, whether that torment is self-inflicted or not.

Be kind, shrug off the negative comment, and embrace the positive ones.

Be ‘too different.’

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